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The 4 worst parents on the internet

The Laptop Cowboy

This dad is an “IT expert”, which you find out early on in the video during his first Humble Brag moment, of which there are many– too many for a video not about him, I’d say. He found a nasty status update on his 15-year-old daughter’s Facebook wall condemning her parents for treating her “like a slave” and making her life harder than it needs to be, presumably because she was feeling some pressure from her accumulating responsibilities, of which she’s never known in her ~10 years of self-awareness. A 15-year-old feeling pressure? What a WILD CONCEPT! If only she had loving, supportive parents to guide her through this period of turmoil.

Instead of recognizing this complaint from his daughter as the same whiny, angsty musings that every middle-class American teenager in the history of the entire post-Industrial Revolution nation has, he takes this as a personal attack on his character and chooses to express the valid point that she “has it easy” by wagging his cigarette-gripping finger at her via Youtube and shooting ~*~special~*~ exploding cowboy bullets through her computer. Because the best way to teach a child about privilege is to directly antagonize her on a public stage. Sure, can’t see how could that would breed anything but respect and submission from his daughter….

The worst part about this video is that this father is not only literally dressed like a cowboy, he actually displays textbook Cowboy behavior by stroking his own ego, delivering self-praise, and comparing his adult self to his adolescent child before literally pulling out a gun and destroying a $700 computer while explaining how badass his bullets are– because taking down a wild laptop in the wilderness requires a ~*~special~*~ kind of weapon. He’s not like a regular dad, he’s a cool dad.

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— 8 hours ago
#bad parenting  #worst parents on the internet  #facebook parent 
6 things the Harry Potter fandom doesn’t even know it wants yet

I’m going to start off by saying that the title of this story is misleading and yes, it’s because the title field doesn’t fit “Weird fan fictions I either invented or have indulged in that should be made into a real Later Years book”.

Here are the six things that the [easyazon-link asin=”0545162076” locale=”us”]Harry Potter[/easyazon-link] may or may not know it wants that J.K. Rowling will probably never give us. (Never say never?)

1. Malfoy/Granger affair

Let’s skip the part where everyone goes, “Ewww I HATE Malfoy!” and jump straight to part where we all admit we want this to happen for real:

We all know tragic Draco had a huge hard-on for Hermione and, if we’re being honest with ourselves, we wanted it so bad. If you think you don’t want it, you just don’t know it yet because you totes didn’t read the books (book-shaming you!) or you read them after your Hogwarts-age hormones stopped confusing you. #millennialproblems. Either way, it doesn’t take a literature expert to deduce that Malfoy had a major guilt complex about his infatuation with Granger Danger that drove him to his sociopathic ethos before he was rescued from true evil by that harsh smash of reality in year 6.

In 2016, a more mature Malfoy and a maritally jaded Hermione meet again at the Leaky Cauldron and fall into a forbidden love affair that ends in a dual between Ron and Malfoy. Malfoy is ripped with blonde five o’clock shadow and his newfound character is written by Nicholas Sparks.

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— 1 week ago with 1 note
#fan fiction  #fanfic  #harry potter  #a very potter musical  #hp fanfic  #humor  #entertainment 
Win one of 5 free downloads of Tomb Raider for Mac

At the end of last month, we told you Mac gamers that you need to play the Tomb Raider reboot. We were serious. So is Feral Interactive, the publisher of the Macintosh version, and that’s why they’ve given us five Steam codes for Tomb Raider.

As described on Steam:

Tomb Raider explores the intense and gritty origin story of Lara Croft and her ascent from a young woman to a hardened survivor. Armed only with raw instincts and the ability to push beyond the limits of human endurance, Lara must fight to unravel the dark history of a forgotten island to escape its relentless hold.

— 4 weeks ago with 1 note
#apple  #mac  #gaming  #tomb raider  #video games  #gamertell 
Our totally unnecessary iPhone 6 unboxing video

I received my iPhone 6 today. I removed it from the box. I filmed the process. Why? I have no idea. I have no idea why I go to graduation ceremonies and parades when I don’t get their point, either, but I’m told it’s appropriate behavior. I’m also told unboxing videos are appropriate behavior, too, so here’s our iPhone 6 unboxing video.

— 4 weeks ago
#apple  #iphone 6  #unboxing  #tech